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And the comments continue to come in: I cry as I read the posts....

This blog covers concerns you may have about emotional issues, health, sexuality, marriage, love relationships, parenting, retirement planning and more. Kathy Mc Coy Official Website: anguish is palpable in the comments to my post about parents and adult children "Finding The Balance." Even though I wrote the post a year and a half ago, it is still by far -- every day -- the most read post I've ever written.

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I just want to know how to cope with these feelings I am having of being such an outsider in my daughter's life... I was blessed beyond measure with the joy they brought into my life and all of the memories we made together. I put my life aside for my children who have lots of medical issues. My daughter said to me yesterday "I have my own family now." I am very perplexed about my daughter's inability to call me every once in a while. I just can't believe my children can be that uncaring. The dream, of course, is close and warm relationships with your independent adult children, perhaps as you had with your parents (or wish you had had with your parents.) And there are some young adult children who are truly wonderful about maintaining close and warm ties with their parents. Why are loving parents -- who seem to ask so little -- so shut out of their adult children's lives?

It is one thing to be loved, even better to be liked. I am fighting depression because I feel like such an outsider.

l limit my calls to once a week and sometimes she doesn't return my call.

It wasn't until the daughter was nearing 30 that she rediscovered the joy of close ties with her mother.

I've seen other friends and patients blind-sided and baffled by sudden hostility from adult children who, as they mark their new independence, start complaining about their parents' deficiencies in parenting.

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