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The lobby was large and inviting, and all the rooms had views of Lake Michigan, the Midway Plaisance, or the Chicago skyline. She was tiny, blonde, with a pointy nose and chin and large blue eyes.
Because I already had a year of college under my belt, I felt confident among the wide-eyed freshman who populated the majority of the dorms in broadview. As soon as I saw her, I wrote her off as a girl that would scoff at any association with me. Just because a girl was more empirically attractive didn’t mean that she shouldn’t date me.
For me, I realized that I should have been dating my girlfriend’s best friend a few weeks after I had become exclusive with my girlfriend.
Since college, my lack of confidence has betrayed me several times.
At the same time, I would talk with Kathy every time I saw her, and even started visiting her in the lounge when I knew she was there studying.♦◊♦At some point, Christine screwed up. Sometimes I felt guilt for even continuing the relationship. You should let me take you out on a date.”Sure enough, she agreed.♦◊♦I began holding her hand when we were alone, getting her used to touching me. I ran into her multiple times after the breakup while I was courting and later dating Kathy.
It’s happened many times in history: the Bush presidency, the XFL, Prohibition.She had to tell me something, and I already had an idea what it was. They would get drunk with her and even smoke weed with her, but it was all in good fun. Over the break, Christine had cheated on me with one of the police officers, and to make it worse, they had had sex in the back seat of his police cruiser. If I truly loved her, I would have been much more upset. She had gotten her answer.♦◊♦It was only about a month later when Christine told me that she loved me, and I was put in the awkward position of not being able to reciprocate. Whatever it was, I had nimbly skipped my way through the minefield of dating two friends.Every time she went home, Christine would hang out with a group of local police officers. I still don’t know how I managed to stammer through that one. Nothing was going to stop me from advancing on the girl I knew I wanted.♦◊♦Over the next few weeks, I thrust myself into Kathy’s life. The thrilling thing wasn’t that I ransacked a clique one by one—it was the fact that yet again, the girl I wanted became my girlfriend.When we did kiss, it was like I was introducing her to the concept of what kissing was. I second-guessed myself—and instead of vowing to trust my instincts in the future, I kept on doubting.I doubted my way through relationship after failed relationship.